How to Benefit from Your Finite Capacity for Worry
photo credit: javiekitela
Do you find that you’ve always got something on your mind or something to worry about? Have you ever noticed that the fewer worries you have, the more time you devote to each?
I seem to have a finite capacity for worrying or debating things with myself. If there are lots of issues to think about they all get a little thought, but when there’s only one issue it can expand to occupy almost as much brain time as handling several problems at once.
Here’s an example: you could be worried about your job security, juggling financial priorities and trying to repair a damaged relationship with a friend. Those are all medium grade issues, none are crises. You’ll think and worry about each a little. But if the only issue you face is fixing your finances, there’s nothing to push it off centre stage so you’ll likely spend all your worrying time obsessing over that one issue.
In other words, the problem expands to fill the space available for its contemplation. There’s a stark similarity between this phenomenon and Parkinson’s Law, the adage that “work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.”
The consequence is that a single problem can get blown out of all proportion. You make a mountain out of a molehill. This can lead to unnecessary mental torment, paralysis in tackling the problem and procrastination.
OK, problem identified. So what’s the solution? Here are some methods you can use to reduce the time you spend worrying about problems:
- Get it off your mind: in best Getting Things Done-style, get the problem out of your head. Write it down, draw it, roll it up in a ball and bounce it around. Having a phyical representation of the problem can give you the brain space to think of new solutions or ways around the issue. Simply the process of writing the problem down can be cathartic.
- Get more problems: if worrying capacity is finite, having more problems means less capacity per problem. In the same way they say you should give an urgent task to a busy person, giving a problem to a person in problem-solving mode means it’s more likely to get tackled.
- Get some perspective: imagine the worst case scenario. Is it really that bad? If the worst case scenario is catastrophic, stop worrying and do something about it now. If the worst that might happen is less drastic than that, be thankful for small mercies, chide yourself gently for getting worked up over something so small and move on.
- Make a date to deal with it: allocate an hour to really focus in on the problem. Most likely your worrying is unstructured thinking in the quiet moments of your day such as while driving or cooking. You need to focus solely on the problem to really get your arms around it. Set aside some time, sit down with a pen and paper or computer, and plot your strategy. Brainstorm solutions and think who might be able to offer advice. Setting some actions and following through on them will reward you with progress and show that you can deal with this issue after all.
- Set a definite end date: quite often you don’t know what to do to resolve a problem, at least not straight away. That’s OK because it can be very helpful to give yourself some time to think about an issue, to sleep on it, and sometimes an elegant solution will come to mind. But if you wait too long, you end up taking no action at all while continuing to worry yourself. So, when you notice that something keeps popping up in your consciousness and demanding you worry about it, set a deadline for mulling things over. Think about it all you like until then. The deal is that when you reach the deadline, you must take action, perhaps by brainstorming solutions as suggested above.
I’m keen to hear if any of you have experienced this phenomenon. It might be that I’m the only one, in which case that’s something else to worry about…
You, Inc., or Reasons to Think of Yourself as a Company
Many businesses have a number of advantages over individuals: strong brands, an expectation they’ll invest, a marketing department, market power and more. You can tap some of those advantages by thinking of yourself as a company: there’s you, and then there’s You, Inc.
Why would you want to do this? I often find looking at familiar issues in a new way can throw up better ways of doing things. There are many advantages to this way of thinking, across many areas of life:
- Your employer is your customer, not your master: your employer is a consumer of the unique services offered by You, Inc. Rather than you being lucky to have a job and fearful of losing it, they are lucky to have you. So long as the company performs, the customer should keep coming back for more. If it helps, think of yourself as a consultant brought in for your expertise in your area. And if you lose your customer (your job), then you’ll just have to find another customer, or perhaps more than one to give you greater resilience.
- Invest in You, Inc.: if you pump investment into your company, it should grow and generate better returns for you the shareholder. You might finally get around to doing some professional training or qualifications. Or consider diversifying your company by exploring a new area of interest or employment. Perhaps develop your financial, computer or language skills.
- Don’t take things personally: if you’re sensitive to criticism, imagining your own company creates a buffer layer between you and the negative comments. Any criticism is only of your company. While you may not like your company being criticised, it’s less personal than direct criticism of you. This slight detachment may also give you the space to respond appropriately and constructively rather than following your normal automatic response, which might be to lash out or to retreat.
- Better decision making: all companies have a mission statement. Developing a mission statement for You, Inc. will give you some guiding principles to refer to when faced with a difficult decision. Framing the decision in terms of which option is most in line with your company’s values and ambitions can make the way ahead appear clearer.
- Develop a marketing strategy: You, Inc. is never going to thrive in the marketplace if you don’t attract customers. Build your brand by getting yourself known in your field, both professional and personal, as demonstrating positive qualities you think are important. Socially you might want to be approachable, confident, friendly or helpful. Professionally you want the market to know that You, Inc. can be relied upon to do an efficient, high quality, punctual job.
- Regular dividends: If you think of yourself as a shareholder in You, Inc., you’ll be sure to pay yourself a regular dividend. If your salary is You, Inc.’s profit, you can ensure you save regularly by automatically paying yourself a dividend in the form of savings. Remember, according to the law a company’s foremost responsibility is to its shareholders.
There’s nothing to lose in trying this out as an experiment. Feel free to chalk up your successes in the comments.
